90% of Helping Is Just Showing Up
continued from Home Page

I called a friend to inquire about his well-being during his course of chemotherapy. His wife answered and said “Thank you for having the courage to call.” Courage?? Is that what it takes? Apparently. Why else would kind folks put off these spirit-lifting contacts? It must be fear.

When I ask people what they think is feared they always say, “I’m afraid I will say the wrong thing.” They fear hurting the person with inane or inappropriate comments, trite reflections or bad advice. Then a greater harm follows — they stay away. They leave the person alone.

Happily, as mentioned above, the reality is that most of the time the hurting person overlooks those dreaded poorly aimed arrows, those sentences that fail to hit the target dead center. Brilliant remarks aren’t needed. Saying “hello” is.

When you make contact with anyone recovering from, or in the middle of, a trying challenge, “hello” may be the main thing. After that, listening takes over as the called one — who needs to talk — jumps at the opportunity afforded by your contact. Nothing to fear.

If you have read this far you may now want to turn your energy into action. Think of someone you could contact. Follow through. Set aside all reservations—fear, apprehension, nervousness, and especially all rationalizations that the call is not necessary. You will bless yourself by touching another.