In This Issue

Start with Listening

Raising the Bar

The Miracle of Kindness Available on Kindle

2009 Kindness Conference Speakers

My Yellow Blankie

Light Notes

2009 Conference Schedule

Little Johnny

Start with Listening

—— Dr. James R. Kok

There are endless ways to show Care and Kindness. Frequently, in the newspaper or popular magazines, I read moving anecdotes about wonderful generosity and remarkable acts of caring. I hope and pray that such goodness will continue to multiply and expand in our world—near and far. It is basic Christian living to find creative ways, simple and profound, to brighten the lives of other people.

My recommendation to you is to start your life of care with listening. It is an easily overlooked way of showing powerful kindness inconspicuously, naturally, and effectively. Everybody needs it. Everybody appreciates being listened to. We all should be able to do it well.

Good listening is largely about empathy. The dictionary definition of this key quality is this: “The projection of one’s own personality into the personality of another in order to understand him/her better; the ability to share in another’s emotions or feelings.”

That is what the caring listener does. She thinks, or realizes, what it is like to be going through what the other is going through. To do this, we reach back and recall how we felt when we went through a loss—it doesn’t have to be the same thing. I do not have to recall the death of my grandmother to know what it is like for you. I can remember the death of a friend to know what your grandma’s death must be like for you. Then I put that into words, such as: “You must be feeling pretty sad.”

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Dr. James R. Kok has written a series of articles on the essentials for a caring person. A handful of basic tools—wrapped in courage—are the keys to open doors.

As the Koach Of  Kare,
Dr. Kok has been a pastor at the Crystal Cathedral for the past twenty years and heads the Care Ministry department of the church. He is the author of five books and numerous articles, and he is the founder of the Conference on Care and Kindness.

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